July 8, 2010: Sort Of Fabulous Network News Update

Bellringer: Turn 13!

Action Item: Dirkszon in The Hood!
- No, we're not especially hip, but Commander Dirkszon has literally entered The Hood, which apparently had been mortgaged to the hilt by Inviso Pirate Taidaishar. One could say that Taidaishar was Hoodwinked worse than Little Red Riding Hood, but that might be going too far so we won't say that at all.

Second Item: Eighter, I Barely Even Knew Her!
- Large battles dominated the news this tick, including at the world Eighter. General Ahabig coordinated the landing of 13 disparate fleets, which, as everyone knows, is actually 15 fleets in base 8 math. We would like to wish the General lots of luck with reconfiguring all his FP into base 8 for future endeavors.

Third Item: Sith Down And Shuth Up!
- Actually, the Sith seem to be anything but down in "Jedi and Padawan", and Darth Sidious and Darth Maul seem to be off to the (landspeeder) races and developing distance from their victims opponents. One wonders if any of the Jedi have, yanno, a lightsaber or droid or even a scruffy looking nerf herder to throw at the highly competitive Sith. Our hearts go out to that galaxy, which appears likely to be ruled by the rule of 2.

And now a word from our sponsor: Greater Guir Athletic League- "Donate now! It's okay if you're not an athlete, so long as you're an athletic supporter!"

Travail, UC News Reporter

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