June 28, 2011: SoFNN- Never Summer Mega News

Never Summer, Turn 9!!

We're back, speeding the best of the best and the best of the worst to you since you started paying attention!

Action Item: Gimak Turns Out To Be Proponent Of Newtonian Physics!
- General Gimak demonstrated the 2nd law of thermodynamics upon his invasion of Newton this past cycle: for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. "I attacked, they fell" he told this reporter. And that was without an apple hitting him on the head. (Editor's note- So far as we can tell.)

Second Item: A Dubious Proposition!

- Commander Mokat invaded Swamp Lord Sandsorb at Dubious last cycle, which seems, in hindsight at least, a Dubious proposition, as his invasion fleet was reduced to swamp gas by the defender.

Third Item: Ya Mon!
- Pastafarians report that Spiderrific Hardluck has gone 'Dread', or at least has successfully invaded and captured the planet Dread. None of the native population survived, which would certainly account for the feeling of dread on Dread as the dreaded attack unfolded! One would guess that the flying spaghetti monsters were well-foddered for the battle.

And now, a word from our sponsor: Rock 'em, Sock 'em Elmo Dolls- "Our Tackle-me Elmo's fight back!"

Travail, UC News Reporter

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