February 4, 2019: New News

Turn 7 Mega News-- All the news, none of the fake!

Episode 4: A New Hope!

- Which was promptly incinerated by Master Spider Koneko, along with more than half the population and all of the new Jedi. Hope no more.

In Like Flynn (As Long As Flynn Is A Ninja)!

- Commander Greyhulk swept into Ninja unseen, but not unfelt. On cat-like, tabi'd feet (Ed. Note. No. Nope. Done with the Ninja metaphor.)

Nozamistan Exed!

- A lone X6 was sent on a suicide run to Nozamistan, and Arillus made sure to give him what he wanted. A feint? A missed gift? A fighter pilot out for a starlit sail in Noz infested space? Your guess is as good as ours. (Ed. Note: Better.)

Sponsor's corner-- This report brought to you by The Center for Religious Brainwashing- "Dogma is man's best friend!"

Travail, UC News Reporter

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